About Life in Arabia - What are the Pressures and the Pleasantries
Many people are amazed that a person would choose to live his/her life in the Arab World, especially if the person comes from an advanced country such as would be found in North America or Europe. The words dangerous, deprived, depressed, demoralized, denigrated, deranged, damned and daunting are used to indicated the possible tribulations that a person used to safe, sufficient, salient, superficial, superior, sensitive, selective and sensible would make the comparison of what you give up and what you get.
I always say for me; I would be a small cog in a big wheel in America but here I am a Big Gog in a small wheel. What this means is that in a very highly elevated and regimented system like in the West there is little chance for the normal IQ people to make a dent, while in the Middle East where so many people would feel out of place, there is an opportunity to make your small efforts shine and to be amplified.
In the past 5 years there have been many high profiled managers who came to advise the rulers in this region to do this and that, which ultimately landed them in trouble. This has actually bursted the bubble that made high profile movers and shakers in the west to loose much of their ever-shine. There was a time where whatever any western high profile business figure said would go without question. In the end they found that when the going gets rough, these people just leave.
I’ve been in the GCC countries for the last 24 years and have been involved in many firsts. I designed and built the first shopping mall in Qatar, introduced the first amusement park in Qatar, built the first dolphinarium in Dubai and have helped many people with very simple business tasks that made their organizations shing. And this I did with relatively little reward. Mainly because I was not a company, or a high profiled person or had too much baggage that made my role too expensive. The truth is that I was so excited to start and to these projects that I was happy just to be able to survive and have the great experience of doing something tremendous.
What I have learned in Arabia is that my friends are always there for me and they never forget me or discount me whether or not I am successful, have money or am high profile. What I really learned is that I will not go without for whatever reason because the people that I have touched over the years will make sure that I am at their side IF I NEED TO BE. It is only a matter of calling them and telling them that I want to do something.
In the West we are more secure in what we do because the system as a governmental rights issue supports us more than in the Middle East. What is most supportive in the ME is that when you are regarded as a good person who is deserving to be supported then it happens. People will step forward to give you a hand. Of course there are the normal human emotions of jalousie and regret, but I have seen even bitter competitors live side by side and kiss and hug each other in trying and happy times. They put aside their business instincts to be in Majelis.
What is Majelis? It is a place to gather to share your presence with people you care about. It is a room surrounded by low lying chairs or pillows where you sit and share your experiences with people. The Majelis is usually held by a prominent person such as a Sheihk or a popular business man. The purpose in the old days was to keep up on the news and to share time together in order to create solidarity. But it had evolved into a tool that became so important to stabilize relationships and to resolve disputes and find solutions to problems. You could meet almost anybody in the majelis, as people came and went. One way to resolve your problems with somebody was to hope to find them in majelis with influential people who could act as mediators.
During my 24 years I sat in many majelises and witnessed so many events where people had interacted in positive ways to very negative situations. I tried to find our western equivalent. The only thing I could find was a bar, tavern or pub, which usually created more problems than they solved (booze). Our churches and social gatherings are not the same as they are focused on worship or fellowship and normally they have little to do with the people that we interact with on a daily basis.
I you hold majelis you can be sure that the people who come are those who have had something to do with you or may be family. Anybody can show up at anybody’s majelis and cannot be rejected. Event the Emir of the country if you want to go to his majelis then it is possible… it would raise a few eyebrows but it is entirely possible.
While times are changing, the past 20 years has seen a sharp decline in the number of majelises being held.. the tradition is still imporant and is surviving as people find out that it is the only real way to keep in close contact with the people who make up their lives.
